i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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