Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
