It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
You may now shotgun with the bride
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
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