there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
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