i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
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