Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
Randomize