I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
my nose is crying tears of wow.
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
Randomize
