Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
