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• (248): View more from Michigan

  if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me

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• (973): View more from New Jersey

  just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.

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• (516): View more from New York

  Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.

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• (970): View more from Colorado

  Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.

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  21 People Tragically Stumbled Upon A Dead Body

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• (614): View more from Ohio

  ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund

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• (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  no more duck duck goose at the bar

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• (408): View more from California

  We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.

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• (662): View more from Mississippi

  We should reintroduce naked Mondays

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• (760): View more from California

  I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.

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  27 Socially Expected Things That Are The Absolute Worst

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• (419): View more from Ohio

  She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.

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• (229): View more from Georgia

  I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is

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• (812): View more from Indiana

  I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.

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• (678): View more from Georgia

  How'd your Tinder date go?

  (931): View more from Tennessee

  Well, I met his girlfriend...

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• (248): View more from Michigan

  You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.

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• (810): View more from Michigan

  The power of my boobs compel you

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