Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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