I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
Randomize
