fml, blew my nose and red sprinkles came out and did the splits when i sneezed
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
A+ Viking dick
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
