It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
Randomize
