I could make wine with my vomit
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
Randomize