If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
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