bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
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