This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
21 NSFW Facts About Famous Celebrities That Will Blow Your Mind
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
These Are 19 of the Most Horrible Strangers People Had to Sit Next to
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in