Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Randomize
