why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
