i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Impromptu road trip to New Orleans for four days of Mardi Gras. I'll probably be alive and back for Valentine's Day plans, probably won't stick my dick in some random either-might be using my free pass you cheating asshat. Love you. Expect random texts & probably a drunk dial or twelve. You did this to yourself. You're not invited so don't bother. Have fun at work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
Randomize