it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
