I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Randomize
