I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
Randomize
