The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize