What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize