But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Great parenting moment: noticing your kid is going to puke from gorging fish sticks and sending her outside. Then watching her puke on your dog.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
Accidentally texted co-worker instead of bf “I’m wfh tomrw. Nooner? 💦”
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
Randomize