I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
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