Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
Holy shit dude........stairs
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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