I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
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