I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
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