I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
Randomize
