so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
Reason #3 women are better than men: texting and peeing simultaneously. Write THAT in the fucking snow.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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