I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
Randomize
