If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Randomize
