Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
Randomize
