i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
Randomize
