Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
Randomize
