i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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