the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
Opened my wallet to find a slice of ham with a phone number written on it in sharpie.
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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