Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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