a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
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