Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
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