Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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