carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
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