Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Life without a bra equals bliss.
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
Randomize