On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
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