I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
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