i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
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