Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
Randomize
