Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
NoShamevember. You game?
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
Randomize