look no pants
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
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