Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
Randomize
